Where in the Word is Richard Simmons? And Why We Care.

Richard Simmons is a name that immediately evokes the image of the highly energetic and refreshingly eccentric fitness guru – who spent decades single-handedly rebranding the self-assurance of helpless housewives and lazy citizens who relied on his heightened antics to whip them into shape.

The tools of his trade included his ferocious stamina, head of action-resistant tight curls, coupled with his outfit of choice that always remained his endearing signature. Those requirements made Simmons hard to resist and even harder to forget.

His vital endurance and dominant influence quickly catapulted him into household name status – making an instant cultural symbol.

But lately rumors have been swirling about the now 67-year-old former body-conscious sensation who was last seen at the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade back in 2013.

Simmons seemingly withdrew from the public after that and his consistent absence has sparked the interest of conspiracy theorists as well as former acquaintances who are convinced that the man who made short shorts a national staple could be enduring a hostage situation in his own home.

Simmons’ former assistant, Mauro Oliveira who has since written a book appropriately titled King Rich and the Evil Witch, ignited the heat behind this theory by speculating that his one time boss was being held against his will by his housekeeper.

Oliveira spoke to ABC News’ Nick Watt and reiterated the fact that he saw Simmons two years ago and in that time, he believes that the household staff under the direction of the female housekeeper who is utilizing her adherence to witchcraft – are all keeping Simmons under lock and key in order to secure his million dollar fortune.

As far-fetched as it sounds – this isn’t entirely unfathomable if it there was some truth to it.

But Richard Simmons is apparently doing quite well and functioning with all his faculties intact. He made this known while setting the record straight via a phone interview with Entertainment Tonight on Sunday, where he expressed his gratitude that fans still care about him after all this time. But the reasons for his disappearing act aren’t as dire as they’ve been made out to be. It’s quite simple. He just needs to chill out. For as long as it takes.

“I am not kidnapped”. “I am just in my house right now”. Simmons goes on to give a recap of why his self-imposed exile was necessary. “I love all the people who worry about me. But it was time for me to take some time to be myself. For the last 40 years I have been travelling, teaching classes, and I had knee injury, so I had a knee replacement, which was very difficult for me. I have really just been taking it easy, staying at home, working out in my gym and dong the things I haven’t done in a very long time”.

Makes absolute sense and for those wondering why it matters whether or not Simmons is of sound and mind and body – it may everything to do with how much he contributed to the early fitness craze that took hold way before Jane Fonda’s videos became the mandated body language.

Simmons was committed and unapologetic with his uniquely unrestricted approach that happened to give him license to be the Mad Hatter of the the still thriving feverish genre.

In true style, Simmons ended his statement by confirming that even though he’s been sidelined by the varying symptoms of aging – he hasn’t abandoned his longstanding regimen.

“I still weigh 150”. “I work out every day. I have a gym at the house, and I am very healthy”.

And all is well with the world.