{"id":13938,"date":"2015-09-03T00:56:13","date_gmt":"2015-09-03T00:56:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/?p=13938"},"modified":"2015-09-03T01:00:47","modified_gmt":"2015-09-03T01:00:47","slug":"idris-elba-is-james-bond-and-rush-limbaugh-is-dr-no-let-the-thunderball-begin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/2015\/09\/03\/idris-elba-is-james-bond-and-rush-limbaugh-is-dr-no-let-the-thunderball-begin\/","title":{"rendered":"Idris Elba is James Bond. Rush Limbaugh is Dr. No: Let the Thunderball Begin!"},"content":{"rendered":"<!-- google_ad_section_start --><p>Idris Elba will be uttering the phrase: \u201cThe name is James\u2026James Bond\u201d. And it\u2019s going to happen sooner rather than later. Sure, white males can\u2019t fathom the notion that a black man could possibly be recruited to the elite position of protecting an old white lady who walks around with a crown of jewels on her head.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/screen-shot-2014-12-21-at-12-55-23-pm.png\"><img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-13939\" src=\"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/screen-shot-2014-12-21-at-12-55-23-pm.png\" alt=\"screen-shot-2014-12-21-at-12-55-23-pm\" width=\"640\" height=\"367\" srcset=\"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/screen-shot-2014-12-21-at-12-55-23-pm.png 640w, http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/screen-shot-2014-12-21-at-12-55-23-pm-300x172.png 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 640px) 100vw, 640px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>Yes, to be fair, anybody assigned to be <strong>On Her Majesty\u2019s Secret Service,<\/strong> presumably has to be an overindulgent white male because they are the only ones who can get away with the <strong>License to Kill<\/strong> and be revered for it.<\/p>\n<p>But the flip switch is on now motherfuckers! <strong>The Man with the Golden Gun <\/strong>is not so \u201cgolden\u201d anymore. He never really was. He was always an overhyped, homegrown assassin who fucked around while fucking up his elaborate targets. So\u2026actually any man with a sizable dick and a physique that lends itself to the ability to demolish the bad guys can recite the code \u201c007\u201d before getting the job done.<\/p>\n<p>Sounds like we need a polished gangster for this particular kind of work. He should be a black man \u2013 with a roster of \u201cstreet\u201d cred who sounds and looks like he can kick some major ass. Oh, but wait! We already have the white version of this proposed \u201csuave\u201d hottie who will <strong>Thunderball<\/strong> anyone or anything that gets in his way.<\/p>\n<p>Daniel Craig is fulfilling his obligations quite well by rising to the occasion and surpassing most expectations. First and foremost, he is a white man \u2013 an essential requirement for an elite agent who intends to freely scour exotic locales in search of highly classified mayhem. And lastly, he is a white man. James Bond has to be white. He can\u2019t be a black street thug with black skin and dark eyes because that would be distractingly menacing.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/wpkp4may9t8nsljlztfh.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-13940\" src=\"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/wpkp4may9t8nsljlztfh.jpg\" alt=\"wpkp4may9t8nsljlztfh\" width=\"636\" height=\"424\" srcset=\"http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/wpkp4may9t8nsljlztfh.jpg 636w, http:\/\/mytrendybuzz.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/wpkp4may9t8nsljlztfh-300x200.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 636px) 100vw, 636px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Strangely enough \u2013 isn\u2019t Mr. Bond supposed to put fear in the eyes of his enemies or is he mandated to seduce then to death with his steely blue\/green eyes? It seems the critics \u2013 mostly racist white males \u2013 are vehemently against a strappingly solid black man rescuing and sexually pleasuring white damsels in distress while also playing around with sophisticated gadgets, and dashing around in an Aston Martin \u2013 all in the name of justice. The thought of it makes them gag.<\/p>\n<p>Well, their nightmare is about to be realized. Idris Elba will be kicking <strong>The Living Daylights<\/strong> out of anyone who dares to hamper his most ambitious mission yet. The delightfully poetic task will involve our now \u201crevamped\u201d Bond to dutifully give <strong>Dr. No<\/strong>, a villain with pasty white skin and a fiery venomous mouth, played to perfection by veteran asshole, Rush Limbaugh \u2013 <strong>A View to a Kill<\/strong>. This will be a drastic warning to <strong>Dr. No<\/strong> that the rules have changed which means spewing out bigotry will no longer be tolerated unless you intend to <strong>Skyfall<\/strong> off a very high building.<\/p>\n<p>But even after delivering this statement of impending doom, our very \u201cblack \u201cand very \u201cstreet\u201d James Bond has to take measures to protect his identity as <strong>The Man with the Golden Gun,<\/strong> because he is not only in hiding but he is also now an American citizen with a British accent.<\/p>\n<p>This would normally be an ideal disposition but unfortunately he is a black man. Black men in America with or without a gun are recreationally murdered. So in order to escape the \u201cMen in Blue \u201c to ensure that he is guaranteed to <strong>Die and Another Day<\/strong>, he has to use his <strong>Goldfinger<\/strong> for the sole purpose of dismantling the <strong>Quantum<\/strong> \u2013 the organization responsible for unspeakable crimes against the dark people.<\/p>\n<p>This black James Bond vows to provide lasting <strong>Solace<\/strong> to a population that has been systematically tormented beyond reason. The assignment is a brutal exercise in discipline and despite the fuckery he encounters in various forms including toying with the poisonous tentacles of a vile woman known as <strong>Octopussy<\/strong> played by an impressive performer who is known for her overnight success on the stage of bullshit \u2013 Sarah Palin &#8211; our very black and very bold super agent in the form of the uber talented Idris Elba continues to persevere. Proving beyond a doubt that <strong>Tomorrow Never Dies.\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>But after he retrieves the <strong>GoldenEye<\/strong> with his <strong>Goldfinger<\/strong>, which is the weapon that will allow the black people to once and for all reclaim world dominion \u2013 he is captured by <strong>Spectre,<\/strong> an overgrown flesh-eating mammal who was once human but underwent a transformation due to the manipulation of dollars and cents. The casting for this role was quick and brilliant. Moneybags entrepreneur \u2013 <strong>Donald Trump<\/strong> willing accepted.<\/p>\n<p>But in the game of black versus white \u2013 <strong>The World Is Not Enough<\/strong> as the body count rises and disharmony plunges the tormented into a feverish need to <strong>Live and Let Die<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>Despite the platinum upheaval &#8211; our magnificent Black Bond played with acute precision under the guidance of \u201cM\u201d \u2013 the head of this operatic operation \u2013 a man with infinite experience with this kind of stuff \u2013 the very black and very capable Steve McQueen will shatter box office records and make Ian Fleming shiver in his grave.<\/p>\n<p>And it will be <strong>For Your Eyes Only<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<!-- google_ad_section_end -->","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Idris Elba will be uttering the phrase: \u201cThe name is James\u2026James Bond\u201d. And it\u2019s going to happen sooner rather than [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1,4,38,6],"tags":[1041,527,1047],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v17.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Idris Elba is James Bond. 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